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This Week's Poll
For Spring Break I'm going to
Head South and get warm
Look for my keys
Sleep and look for summer job
Break my springs
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Choose Your Own Adventure - The Keg Party

#1
It’s seven o’clock and you want to rock, you want to get a belly full of beer. They say that Saturday night’s alright for fighting, but what they don’t tell you is that it’s also ideal for drinking. So it’s a good thing that you and your friends have been invited to a keg party tonight.
If you’d like to start your adventure as a guy: Go to #2
If you’d like to start your adventure as a girl: Go to #3

[more]

A Complete List of "the Twelve" as mentioned in the song "Atlantis" by Donovan, assuming that the last seven would be of even less help to the general population than "the Magician", thus proving that Atlantis was a doomed civilization from the get-go.

"Knowing her fate, Atlantis sent out ships to all corners of the Earth. On board were the Twelve: The poet, the physician, the farmer, the scientist, the magician and the other so-called Gods of our legends."

1. The poet
2. The physician
3. The farmer
4. The scientist
5. The magician
6. The real estate agent
7. The guy who’s really, really good at "Guitar Hero"
8. The porn star
9. The fast food employee
10. The hair dresser
11. The man who always carries a Swiss Army knife
12. The Skipper
Five Thoughts That Went Through My Head After Reading The Comic Strip “Baldo” by Hector Cantu and Carlos Castellanos In Which Baldo Breaks Up With His Girlfriend Immediately After I Myself Had Broken Up With My Girlfriend

1. That bitch.

2. Women are all the same.

3. How is Baldo going to handle the hurt? I can’t wait until tomorrow, I need to know NOW!

4. Oh my God, I’m not as pathetic as Baldo am I? He’s a cartoon, for Christ’s sake.

5. I wonder what Garfield is up to?

Create Your Own Yearbook Entry

Hello, friends. When spring turns into summer and another semester comes to an end it can mean only one thing. Stress. The stress of final exams, the stress of graduating, the stress of discovering you’re not graduating, the stress of deciding if this is the summer you’re finally going to come out to your parents. But there’s perhaps one event that single-handedly creates more stress for students around this time of year than any other. That’s right, once again, it’s yearbook time. Students on campuses around the country will be wracking their brains trying to come up with something both witty and touching to leave in not only their friends’ yearbooks, but also complete strangers who approach them, pen in hand, claiming, "I left a little space over here – just for you to sign." If you’re like most people, you just can’t perform under that kind of pressure. Imagine the disappointment in that yearbook owner’s eyes when you scribble down some cliché statement like "good luck", "don’t ever change", or "bestfriends4ever". It’s just that kind of uninspired hackwork that leads you down a path to a career wearing a paper hat at the local Krispy Kreame. And all because you couldn’t handle the pressure of one little yearbook entry. But not to panic, now there’s a solution to this nation-wide crisis. I have been working around the clock (or, more accurately, during commercial breaks of "the Office") to develop the revolutionary Create Your Own Yearbook Entry. That’s right; Create Your Own Yearbook Entry! For each sentence, you just need to pick either A, B, or C to complete the sentence and make it personal to you and the one you’re writing it for. And it’s so simple, even a community college graduate could do it. By using Create Your Own Yearbook Entry, you’ll no doubt be the envy of all your friends. And isn’t impressing others what life is really all about anyway? All right, get those pens ready, here we go.  [more]


 more . . . Front Page
08.MAY.07 Your Not So Friendly Spider-Man
04.APR.07 What Happens In Vegas, Needs To Stay In Vegas
04.APR.07 Turtle Power Returns In A Big Way
21.MAR.07 Silence, Dead in the Water
15.MAR.07 300 Brutal and Brilliant
14.MAR.07 The Hierarchy of Communication
07.MAR.07 A Not So Delicious Look At Your Next Hamburger
20.FEB.07 Big East Women's Schedule
20.FEB.07 UConn hires off-campus director
20.FEB.07 Huskies cry foul
20.FEB.07 The Rider Ignites On-Screen
14.FEB.07 Cupid Slays 12, Injuries 34, in Brutal Valentine’s Day Massacre
25.JAN.07 President Bush Delivers His State of the Confederacy Address
15.JAN.07 A Drunk and Verbally Abusive Magic 8 Ball Answers Your Questions
20.DEC.06 Punk at Oohbas
20.DEC.06 Anything But Super
13.DEC.06 Rocky Returns to the Ring
13.DEC.06 Kindergarten vs. College
06.DEC.06 Worth The Journey, But It's A Long One
05.DEC.06 Girlfriends vs. Video Games

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